Well folks.....
Its been great...but looks like my life is headed in a different direction. As of today, in one month I will no longer be working for the Degel Family in Switzerland. Things really were not working out, and I must admit I learned ALOT about myself and directions in life I want to go. There is WAY too much to want to type out about the situation, etc. but i have the weekend to myself so I can reflect and really write more. but just so you know...this job here is no longer.
I will miss these kids for sure though.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Where to Even Begin?
Where to Even Begin?
Well folks.....
Its been great...but looks like my life is headed in a different direction. As of today, in one month I will no longer be working for the Degel Family in Switzerland. Things really were not working out, and I must admit I learned ALOT about myself and directions in life I want to go. There is WAY too much to want to type out about the situation, etc. but i have the weekend to myself so I can reflect and really write more. but just so you know...this job here is no longer.
I will miss these kids for sure though.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Really Deep Thoughts..
Every time I get to this point.....(right here, the beginning of writing my blog), I become overwhelmed with all that is built up inside of my mind, that I usually decide to close the window and try another day. However, as I wait another day, and another day, it gets even more built up....so I will now attempt to give you a glimpse of what is going on in Rachel's head. so now...is the part where I have to try to sort out what I will talk about first.
Well I changed my background on my blog because it has somewhat of a significant meaning to me. First of all, it is a girl looking up into the stars (as I would like to say heaven). If you notice, to me it seems that she is either praying, pleading, working on compromising with heaven or at least trying to gain an understanding of what heaven wants her to know. Wow, I sure can relate.
I often catch myself in moments where I am overwhelmed with happiness and awe in the fact that I am living my dream of actually living in Europe! I have wanted to live here at least since I was 16 years old. Something about the European lifestyle and people intrigued me. And even more specific, the Germanic culture. While I am in these surreal moments, another feeling starts to creep in, and its one that is almost overwhelmingly avoidable no matter how hard I try to escape from it. I start to feel alone. Is this just an insecurity that I need to overcome? After all, I am a pretty Independent person...why would I feel alone in a dream world? The answer to this question is one that takes soul searching to find. It isn't easy looking within yourself to find the answers, and in today's society it is easy to look outside ourselves for the answers. Maybe because I am in a country where my mother language isn't spoken all too often, so it leaves one to already have a small barrier between being able to express myself personably to others around me. For example, so many times have I wanted to strike up a conversation with people on the train. On many occasions I felt that someone sitting across from me needed my personal touch to help lighten their day, or even life in general. That might sound a little arrogant but I cannot even begin to tell you how strongly I felt this way and when I get off the train and still see them staring out the window as the train rolls away that I failed at helping that one person.
I guess I am really starting to recognize that those things that helped me be happy on a deeper level in America was my ability to help someone smile or even know that I made an impact in someones life for the better. This is something I am determined to do before I leave Europe, is strengthen my language and culture understandings of those around me so I can be involved in them.
So back to my original statement about my blog....I feel like this girl from time to time. Wanting to understand my purpose here, compromise with heaven for help, and work on really growing into myself.
Really Deep Thoughts..
Every time I get to this point.....(right here, the beginning of writing my blog), I become overwhelmed with all that is built up inside of my mind, that I usually decide to close the window and try another day. However, as I wait another day, and another day, it gets even more built up....so I will now attempt to give you a glimpse of what is going on in Rachel's head. so now...is the part where I have to try to sort out what I will talk about first.
Well I changed my background on my blog because it has somewhat of a significant meaning to me. First of all, it is a girl looking up into the stars (as I would like to say heaven). If you notice, to me it seems that she is either praying, pleading, working on compromising with heaven or at least trying to gain an understanding of what heaven wants her to know. Wow, I sure can relate.
I often catch myself in moments where I am overwhelmed with happiness and awe in the fact that I am living my dream of actually living in Europe! I have wanted to live here at least since I was 16 years old. Something about the European lifestyle and people intrigued me. And even more specific, the Germanic culture. While I am in these surreal moments, another feeling starts to creep in, and its one that is almost overwhelmingly avoidable no matter how hard I try to escape from it. I start to feel alone. Is this just an insecurity that I need to overcome? After all, I am a pretty Independent person...why would I feel alone in a dream world? The answer to this question is one that takes soul searching to find. It isn't easy looking within yourself to find the answers, and in today's society it is easy to look outside ourselves for the answers. Maybe because I am in a country where my mother language isn't spoken all too often, so it leaves one to already have a small barrier between being able to express myself personably to others around me. For example, so many times have I wanted to strike up a conversation with people on the train. On many occasions I felt that someone sitting across from me needed my personal touch to help lighten their day, or even life in general. That might sound a little arrogant but I cannot even begin to tell you how strongly I felt this way and when I get off the train and still see them staring out the window as the train rolls away that I failed at helping that one person.
I guess I am really starting to recognize that those things that helped me be happy on a deeper level in America was my ability to help someone smile or even know that I made an impact in someones life for the better. This is something I am determined to do before I leave Europe, is strengthen my language and culture understandings of those around me so I can be involved in them.
So back to my original statement about my blog....I feel like this girl from time to time. Wanting to understand my purpose here, compromise with heaven for help, and work on really growing into myself.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Pros and Cons
While I choose not to focus on such negative events that have recently passed, I would like to focus on my future. :) Therefore, to some, this may come as a surprise, others have heard the drama story and know exactly where I am at mentally. I am 95% sure about moving to Germany in 2009. I think overall this is a better move for me in the end.
Let me list some Pros and Cons:
Cons:
- I have to figure out new visa information.
- Need to figure out exactly WHAT I want to do in Germany besides just going there.
- I leave 2 beautiful girls here in Switzerland that I have grown attached to.
- I spend more money.
Pros:
- I finally study the culture I have always dreamed about studying. Swiss culture is not for me.
- I will be surrounded by people who speak clear german, of course there are dialects still, but overall you can speak high german with most everyone in germany. Not the same case here in switzerland.
- I have more friends in Germany, and I get alot with Germans alot better overall.
- I can feel more freedom in the sense of choosing what I would like to do. If its an Aupair, I now have the experience to know what type of situation I want to be put into.
- I feel that Heavenly Father is directing me in this way to go to Germany.
Overall, I havent made my decision. Money is being saved, and I am working on figuring out if its worth it or now in the end. I think it will help my german out by far, and I can really feel like I accomplished something by living in the country I have always dreamed to live in.
AS FOR OTHER THINGS:
Life seems to be good. I have had my ups and downs since the last 'talk' my family and I have had. I am grateful I am even in Europe because I love to live here. Also, just being really happy about someone I have met. :) I wont say much here because I like to keep that stuff private. :) Really nice guy, we meet this weekend, we will see what happends. Im sure its going to go well. I will post something later if things are going well. :D
Pros and Cons
While I choose not to focus on such negative events that have recently passed, I would like to focus on my future. :) Therefore, to some, this may come as a surprise, others have heard the drama story and know exactly where I am at mentally. I am 95% sure about moving to Germany in 2009. I think overall this is a better move for me in the end.
Let me list some Pros and Cons:
Cons:
- I have to figure out new visa information.
- Need to figure out exactly WHAT I want to do in Germany besides just going there.
- I leave 2 beautiful girls here in Switzerland that I have grown attached to.
- I spend more money.
Pros:
- I finally study the culture I have always dreamed about studying. Swiss culture is not for me.
- I will be surrounded by people who speak clear german, of course there are dialects still, but overall you can speak high german with most everyone in germany. Not the same case here in switzerland.
- I have more friends in Germany, and I get alot with Germans alot better overall.
- I can feel more freedom in the sense of choosing what I would like to do. If its an Aupair, I now have the experience to know what type of situation I want to be put into.
- I feel that Heavenly Father is directing me in this way to go to Germany.
Overall, I havent made my decision. Money is being saved, and I am working on figuring out if its worth it or now in the end. I think it will help my german out by far, and I can really feel like I accomplished something by living in the country I have always dreamed to live in.
AS FOR OTHER THINGS:
Life seems to be good. I have had my ups and downs since the last 'talk' my family and I have had. I am grateful I am even in Europe because I love to live here. Also, just being really happy about someone I have met. :) I wont say much here because I like to keep that stuff private. :) Really nice guy, we meet this weekend, we will see what happends. Im sure its going to go well. I will post something later if things are going well. :D
Have I lived a Full Life so far?
The bold ones are things I've done. I stole this from Kari's blog. its fun!
1. Started your own blog - duh
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland- and Disneyworld!
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo- many times
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris -in Las Vegas!!
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping- haha many times
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run -on the Wii
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language- teaching....german..does that count?
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant - does mcdonalds count?
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie - a commercial...does that count?
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Totally copied a post from someone else's blog to your own
Have I lived a Full Life so far?
The bold ones are things I've done. I stole this from Kari's blog. its fun!
1. Started your own blog - duh
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland- and Disneyworld!
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo- many times
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris -in Las Vegas!!
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping- haha many times
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run -on the Wii
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language- teaching....german..does that count?
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant - does mcdonalds count?
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie - a commercial...does that count?
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Totally copied a post from someone else's blog to your own
Monday, December 1, 2008
Yay, the Christmas Season is here!!! My favorite things during this season:
1. Christmas Trees!! I love the way people can make them look so different and still all are equally beautiful!
2. Christmas Songs!! I love to sing along to all our favorite songs in the year!
3. Snow!! Ok so I may not like being cold, but snow is beautiful, and when its falling, there is always something so magical about it. :)
4. Family!! I love getting together with family and friends and share our happiness during the season. Its almost unavoidable to be happy when you are with friends carolling or just hanging out with hot chocolate, etc :D
5. Snuggling!! Ok so that sounds pretty funny but when its cold outside, and you have a loved one, that seriously ROCKS! I think christmas strengthens relationships by far.
6. Christmas lights!! I love how people go all out with lights! I dont think I would personally do that, but I love to decorate with lights. :D I just love sitting in the car with christmas music and driving by all the lights!!
Wishing you a MERRY CHRISTMAS!! Please enjoy the season to the FULLEST!! :D
Yay, the Christmas Season is here!!! My favorite things during this season:
1. Christmas Trees!! I love the way people can make them look so different and still all are equally beautiful!
2. Christmas Songs!! I love to sing along to all our favorite songs in the year!
3. Snow!! Ok so I may not like being cold, but snow is beautiful, and when its falling, there is always something so magical about it. :)
4. Family!! I love getting together with family and friends and share our happiness during the season. Its almost unavoidable to be happy when you are with friends carolling or just hanging out with hot chocolate, etc :D
5. Snuggling!! Ok so that sounds pretty funny but when its cold outside, and you have a loved one, that seriously ROCKS! I think christmas strengthens relationships by far.
6. Christmas lights!! I love how people go all out with lights! I dont think I would personally do that, but I love to decorate with lights. :D I just love sitting in the car with christmas music and driving by all the lights!!
Wishing you a MERRY CHRISTMAS!! Please enjoy the season to the FULLEST!! :D
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Thankful
I havent written on here much lately, and while there are alot of stories I could tell, I have decided to make a list of the things I am thankful for. I added a song on my playlist at the end of this blog called 'Thankful' by Josh Groban.....if this song isn't playing right now, please take the time to choose it before reading the rest of blog because the words are amazing and express so much of how I feel. Ok...so go pick it!! :) I will wait.................
Ok so now that is playing, I will list the lyrics here:
Somedays we forget
To look around us
Somedays we can't see
The joy that surrounds us
So caught up inside ourselves
We take when we should give..
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be.
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see.
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Look beyond ourselves
There's so much sorrow
It's way too late to say
I'll cry tomorrow
Each of us must find our truth
It's so long overdue
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And every day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Even with our differences
There is a place we're all connected
Each of us can find each other's light
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though this world needs so much more
There's so much to be thankful for
Ok so, now that you have heard this song, or may be listening to it still, I would like to share some of the things I am thankful for:
- The Gospel - without it, I would be lost. I have been lost a few times and the gospel has always pulled me through. I am grateful to know there is a plan for all of us, and we are given the agency still to choose what we will. I am grateful to know that God is a just God and he knows everyones hearts. That is why it is so important to give service and MEAN it.
- My Mother - Sure, we have had our ups and downs, but what mother daughter relationship hasnt? I am grateful that she had the patience to raise me, to work hard, and still find time to decorate, and cook, etc for the Hollidays, etc. I may not have expressed it that often but I really am grateful for her wonderful spirit growing up. This is a feeling and tradition that blessed my life and I want to pass this spirit to my kids someday. Thank you Mom!
- My Dad - I have had hard times with him as well, and I am grateful that when I may be at rock bottom somewhere he is able to pull me out of it again. We have had some really good times as well with my mom, and I am grateful for his humor and ability to make everyone around him laugh. Humor is definetly a healthy thing in this life.
- My desire to learn - being in Europe has been one of the hardest things I have ever done, and there are so many times I want to give up, however I am determined inside to master this hardship, and already I have learned so much. I am grateful that I have the opportunity to learn another language and live in a different culture.
- My talents - its true, my talents set me free mentally. To be able to go to a piano and play different songs helps relieve stress and tension, and helps my mind wander to a better place instead of anger or frustration. Also when I get lost in the things I am doing I am able to focus on my core self, and I am grateful that I take this time to practice and learn.
Thankful
I havent written on here much lately, and while there are alot of stories I could tell, I have decided to make a list of the things I am thankful for. I added a song on my playlist at the end of this blog called 'Thankful' by Josh Groban.....if this song isn't playing right now, please take the time to choose it before reading the rest of blog because the words are amazing and express so much of how I feel. Ok...so go pick it!! :) I will wait.................
Ok so now that is playing, I will list the lyrics here:
Somedays we forget
To look around us
Somedays we can't see
The joy that surrounds us
So caught up inside ourselves
We take when we should give..
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be.
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see.
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Look beyond ourselves
There's so much sorrow
It's way too late to say
I'll cry tomorrow
Each of us must find our truth
It's so long overdue
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And every day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Even with our differences
There is a place we're all connected
Each of us can find each other's light
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though this world needs so much more
There's so much to be thankful for
Ok so, now that you have heard this song, or may be listening to it still, I would like to share some of the things I am thankful for:
- The Gospel - without it, I would be lost. I have been lost a few times and the gospel has always pulled me through. I am grateful to know there is a plan for all of us, and we are given the agency still to choose what we will. I am grateful to know that God is a just God and he knows everyones hearts. That is why it is so important to give service and MEAN it.
- My Mother - Sure, we have had our ups and downs, but what mother daughter relationship hasnt? I am grateful that she had the patience to raise me, to work hard, and still find time to decorate, and cook, etc for the Hollidays, etc. I may not have expressed it that often but I really am grateful for her wonderful spirit growing up. This is a feeling and tradition that blessed my life and I want to pass this spirit to my kids someday. Thank you Mom!
- My Dad - I have had hard times with him as well, and I am grateful that when I may be at rock bottom somewhere he is able to pull me out of it again. We have had some really good times as well with my mom, and I am grateful for his humor and ability to make everyone around him laugh. Humor is definetly a healthy thing in this life.
- My desire to learn - being in Europe has been one of the hardest things I have ever done, and there are so many times I want to give up, however I am determined inside to master this hardship, and already I have learned so much. I am grateful that I have the opportunity to learn another language and live in a different culture.
- My talents - its true, my talents set me free mentally. To be able to go to a piano and play different songs helps relieve stress and tension, and helps my mind wander to a better place instead of anger or frustration. Also when I get lost in the things I am doing I am able to focus on my core self, and I am grateful that I take this time to practice and learn.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Here's a Thought...
So I have decided to write in this cute little font I found on here. :) Well, I have now been here for 51 days. Some of these days have been ups, and some have been downs...to be honest I cannot figure out whether or not if it is homesickness. Well, of course there are days that I know for sure are homesickness. I also know that some of these days are from the culture shock that I am still experiencing. However, I am hitting a personal struggle being here. When I was in Utah, I finally started to think that I was knowing who I am as a person...well being here really has forced me to a whole new level of getting to know myself. I am, in fact, far from knowing myself. Of course we are always learning about ourselves throughout life, but as far as the level that I want to be at in my life, I now know there is so much more to learn.
Instead of focusing on what I want to learn, or that I have so much MORE to learn, I would like to focus on what I have learned so far.
- I have learned how important it is important to represent my religion in the right ways and for the right reasons. Before I came here to Switzerland, I really struggled with my beliefs, in God, in religion, etc, and wasnt the best example of my church. As you know, I lived in Utah where people of my religion are at vast numbers. In a way, it is a blessing, and also a downfall. I can tell you why I believe this. While I think it is great to have numerous people around you sharing the same beliefs, it is easy to forget that it is important to stand strong and be an example of your religion. After all, everyone is assumed to be lds, therefore values slip, and some try to prove to others how 'obedient' they are to the prophet, when its for the wrong reason. ( Dont get me wrong, it is IMPORTANT to follow our prophet.)So let me get to my point. Some follow the prophet ONLY to show others AROUND them how great they are instead of wanting to show the LORD how great they are. Its a shallow sense of obedience. Well, being here I now realize that I am the only one in my village who is LDS and one of a few who might even know who Christ or Heavenly Father is! Being here, I am a light among men, and an example to others. A major representative of this church. Also, having to sacrifice more time to get to church (at least 30 min each way) and knowing how small my ward is compared to most branches in the U.S. it makes you appreciate those around you with the same values.
- You CANNOT rush children!!! I have learned to work better with my time (still a work in progress) but after wanting to scream and pull my hair out at how none of the kids knew what 'hurry' really meant, I finally came to the conclusion that you simply have to make time for THEM, not YOU. Children really do put their trust in us as examples and helping them get organized means you yourself must be first!
- Ether was was right, after the TRIAL of your faith things will be revealed unto you. I have had to rely on faith in so many situations and everytime I have given myself completely to faith, I have had help.
TO BE CONTINUED.........
Here's a Thought...
So I have decided to write in this cute little font I found on here. :) Well, I have now been here for 51 days. Some of these days have been ups, and some have been downs...to be honest I cannot figure out whether or not if it is homesickness. Well, of course there are days that I know for sure are homesickness. I also know that some of these days are from the culture shock that I am still experiencing. However, I am hitting a personal struggle being here. When I was in Utah, I finally started to think that I was knowing who I am as a person...well being here really has forced me to a whole new level of getting to know myself. I am, in fact, far from knowing myself. Of course we are always learning about ourselves throughout life, but as far as the level that I want to be at in my life, I now know there is so much more to learn.
Instead of focusing on what I want to learn, or that I have so much MORE to learn, I would like to focus on what I have learned so far.
- I have learned how important it is important to represent my religion in the right ways and for the right reasons. Before I came here to Switzerland, I really struggled with my beliefs, in God, in religion, etc, and wasnt the best example of my church. As you know, I lived in Utah where people of my religion are at vast numbers. In a way, it is a blessing, and also a downfall. I can tell you why I believe this. While I think it is great to have numerous people around you sharing the same beliefs, it is easy to forget that it is important to stand strong and be an example of your religion. After all, everyone is assumed to be lds, therefore values slip, and some try to prove to others how 'obedient' they are to the prophet, when its for the wrong reason. ( Dont get me wrong, it is IMPORTANT to follow our prophet.)So let me get to my point. Some follow the prophet ONLY to show others AROUND them how great they are instead of wanting to show the LORD how great they are. Its a shallow sense of obedience. Well, being here I now realize that I am the only one in my village who is LDS and one of a few who might even know who Christ or Heavenly Father is! Being here, I am a light among men, and an example to others. A major representative of this church. Also, having to sacrifice more time to get to church (at least 30 min each way) and knowing how small my ward is compared to most branches in the U.S. it makes you appreciate those around you with the same values.
- You CANNOT rush children!!! I have learned to work better with my time (still a work in progress) but after wanting to scream and pull my hair out at how none of the kids knew what 'hurry' really meant, I finally came to the conclusion that you simply have to make time for THEM, not YOU. Children really do put their trust in us as examples and helping them get organized means you yourself must be first!
- Ether was was right, after the TRIAL of your faith things will be revealed unto you. I have had to rely on faith in so many situations and everytime I have given myself completely to faith, I have had help.
TO BE CONTINUED.........
Thursday, October 16, 2008
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